Dukes of Awesome

Billy Packer Sucks by noaccount
July 14, 2008, 10:26 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Another annoying Packer made headlines this morning. Billy got booted by CBS after 80 some-odd years of ruining the Final Four. The move has been met with near universal praise. In his honor, I’ve compiled a list of ornery old-farts that sort of maybe look like Billy if you squint really hard and just go with it.

Mikhail Sergeyevich Gorbachev

Why he sucks:
1. Given the Nobel Peace Prize for losing the cold war, sending Russia into an ongoing state of social unrest and economic depression.
2. Lost to a president that was symptomatic of the early stages of Alzheimer’s
3. Delusional social reformer that wanted to model Russia after Sweden.
4. Turned his back on Ivan Drago.
5. Pizza shilling douche

Little Bill Daggett (Unforgiven)

Why he sucks:
1. Righteous defender of small junk; lover of free horses
2. Really badass with 5 armed men standing behind him
3. Vision and Methodology for establishing control in the Old West expressed metaphorically by a poorly built house with a leaky roof ( Read: Metaphors are for gays)
4. Thought “deserve” had something to do with it. (Read: Thomas Hobbes loves balls)

Archie Bunker

Why he sucks:

1. What Billy Packer said –

2. What he was thinking about –

Those were the days

Dr. Weird

Dr. Weird does not suck.

2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

This is more like it.

Comment by tgetman

’bout time we had some entertainment.

Comment by DaddyMike

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